https://www.khutbah.info/some-causes-of-divorce/ Marital life is built on affection and compassion as indicated by the words of Allah:Ar Room 21 – And among His Signs is that He created for you wives from among yourselves that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought. Islam cuts off the path of factors leading to destruction of marital life. So that marital life continues with understanding, love and harmony. Resulting in a balanced family that produces children and grandchildren.
Marital life is built on affection and compassion as indicated by the words of Allah:
Ar Room 21 – And among His Signs is that He created for you wives from among yourselves that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.
Islam cuts off the path of factors leading to destruction of marital life. So that marital life continues with understanding, love and harmony. Resulting in a balanced family that produces children and grandchildren.
Divorce is a significant issue because it demolishes the marital home, separates the family and breaks the woman.
In the authentic hadeeth, the Prophet (ﷺ) said: “Indeed the woman is like a rib, if you try to straighten her you will break her, and if you leave her, you will enjoy her in spite of the crookedness.” [Muslim and Al Bukhari]
There are many causes of divorce. Some are because of the husband. Others are because of the wife. While others are because of the husband’s or wife’s families. And some other causes are because of the marital life environment. It is incumbent on the spouses especially if they have children between them that they minimize the opportunity for conflict between them. And to curb the opportunities for divorce that the Shaytan tries to magnify even if they are small. For how many a wife hated certain things about her husband and she was patient then he changed until she loved him? And how many a husband hated a particular behavior in his wife until she changed it and then he loved her? And the marital life continued between them. In this regard the Prophet (ﷺ) said:
“A believer must not hate his believing wife; if he dislikes one of her characteristics he will be pleased with another”. [Muslim]
And from the causes of divorce is that one or both of the spouses are not content with living with one another. Such that the man wishes for a more beautiful wife. Or for a wife that is more skilled in cooking or housekeeping. Men often compare their wife to what they see on television or on social media. In spite of the fact that these women are flaunting and displaying their charms to the maximum. And in many cases it were not for the make-up and adornment he would not even consider comparing them to his wife. For he sees such women in their best state and he sees his wife in her ordinary state. Nonetheless, he compares between them and this is certainly a great transgression.
Likewise there are wives that compare their husbands to what they see on the screen or on social media. Or she may compare him to her friends’ husbands. She may compare looks, style, his treatment and the relationship. And many women lie about their situation with their husbands. They only relate to their friends his best traits. And if she only knew his negative traits she would praise and thank Allah for her own husband.
Often a woman gets disappointed in her husband because he does not take her on trips or does not give her gifts that she wants because he is not financially able. In spite of the fact that he loves her, respects her and treats her well. These factors do not please her even though they are much more important than the material things no matter how much they are.
There is no blessing after Iman and well-being greater than being content. For whomsoever lives satisfied dies satisfied and wins by attaining the pleasure of Allah. Allah will make him satisfied on the Day of Judgement. Because Allah is the one who decrees the measures and he pairs the spouses. And He the Exalted subjects whom He will to whom He wills. And Allah gives of His Bounty to whom He wills without limit. So whomsoever is content with what Allah has decreed for him then he is content with Allah. And whomsoever is discontent with his provision is discontent with His Provider The Most High. In the authentic hadeeth the Prophet (ﷺ) said: Look to one who is lower than you, and do not look to one who is above you. For indeed that is more worthy so that you will not belittle Allah’s favors upon you.”
And from among the causes of divorce is that the spouses become bored because of the routine life that does not change. To break up this boredom, the husband should take care to provide his family relief; This could be through a short trip or a long trip especially if it is a trip of obedience such Umrah or visiting Madinah. Or permissible travel that does not involve sin. For these things renew life between the spouses and remove the boredom and monotony.
Likewise, it is important for the wife to vary her cooking, her clothes and appearance for her husband. So that she renews herself in his mind and captivates his heart. Then he will not get bored of her. All of this is part of having good relations between the spouses that is enjoined in the Great Book:
An Nisa:19 – And live with them in kindness.
And Allah The Most High Said:
Al Baqarah 228- And due to the wives is similar to what is expected of them, according to what is reasonable.
Yahya bin Abdulrahman Al Handhali said: “ I went to Mohammed Bin Al Haneefah and he came out to me covered in a red blanket and his beard was dripping with perfume. I asked: What is this? He responded: I threw this red blanket over my wife and she covered my beard with perfume. Indeed they desire from us the same as we desire from them.”